Thursday, December 25, 2014


6 more days to go and we will be in a brand new year.

Things haven't been going well lately, i wouldn't say 2014 is not a year for me because i was happy, i was happy i am able to sleep well, i was happy for being able to slim down a little bit, i was happy being able to travel alone,  i was happy for being in a job i always wanted but now, i hesitated, i wasn't really sure how is this going to end. I started to wonder if i was strong enough to handle it alone, i know it is going to be hard and being independent is never an issue for me, but i never knew i'd ever want to depend on someone too. 

Perhaps i am taken too many things for granted, i never really care about nurturing a friendship, i am so confined in my own world that i don't want to spend too much effort on others. Simply because i find very few friends that worth giving for. I am a typical introvert, at times i ignore texts or calls from people i don't want to talk to, sometimes i find excuses to reject outings with people i don't feel like to hanging out with, i find gathering draining my energy and i always can't wait to go home. I know it doesn't sound like a healthy life style, all these anti social behavior, but when it comes to people i find worth the effort, it feels like i can be with them forever. it feels so comfortable even when no one is talking, i can always be the craziest version of myself, because you know them so well that they don't care who you are, be it you are at your best or worst, they are there because it's simply just you. 

But i think 2014 was enough introvert for me, as much as i really wanna just stay home and be myself but looking at where i am now i think i need to make things change because i don't think i wanna spend another year wasted. I've been there, i've tried and it's time for some thing else. I am gonna set a list of 2015 resolution for myself, although i've been reluctant to do so because i am so bad at it, my 2014 was just to be myself, follow my heart then i think 2015 would be exploring the world at my own way. It doesn't have to be a complete changes, just take one step at a time, i believe slowly things would fall along the way. 

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